Reasons

by - 3:26 AM

There were reasons of
Why I stopped dreaming to be a swimmer
Why I stopped dreaming to be a football player
Why I stopped learning to play drums
Why I chose social science in high school
Why I failed to get elected by my first dream university
Why I got into the second option of the university I chose during the national selection
Why I stopped drawing
Why I chose communication and journalism as my specialization in my university
Why I started to learn more about photography and graphic design during my study
Why I chose to abandon my thesis for 1 year to work and do more internships
Why I chose to analyze a cover magazine as my thesis
Why I spent 5 years to finish my study
Why I graduated later than the rest of my friends
Why I didn’t work in certain office after graduating
Why I got rejected by several media companies
Why I didn’t pass the test to be a journalist
Why I chose to be happily single when the rest of my friends already met their partners
Why I chose to be graphic designer (and part-time photographer) instead of being a journalist
Why I sent my scholarship application even though I wasn’t so sure about my chance
Why I decided to be a freelance copywriter while I was juggling with many projects
Why I got heartbroken too often
Why I started to learn Spanish since February 2017.
Those failures, those options, those decisions, and those reasons, lead me to the greatest achievement of my life so far
Got the scholarship to study in Spain
Got the opportunities to travel around Europe
Got the opportunities to travel solo more often
Got the opportunities to understand and speak more Spanish (kind of) fluently
Got the opportunities to do some projects here while I am studying
Got the opportunities to meet with amazing new people
Got the opportunities to maintain my relationships well with my good friends in Indonesia
Got to do things I love that I wasn’t able to do them in my own country
Got the opportunities to explore the city where I live
Got the opportunities to watch the concerts of my favorite bands
Got the opportunities to visit many castles (since I love the “Game of Thrones” vibe or medieval theme)
Got to be the best version of myself (so far)
Even though I missed so many important moments of my good friends
When they graduated
When they got engaged
When they got married
When their children were born
Normally I was present, but since last year I couldn’t be there. It shattered my heart to see them only through social media or messenger app.

But hey.

Every failures, decisions, reasons, and moments I missed that bring me here, surely will lead me to another surprise that might change my life again.



You know what? It still feels surreal for me.

These whole new experiences I had since September 2017 still feel like dreams to me.

Meanwhile, I am currently sitting in the balcony of my rented apartment to take a break after several hours writing my thesis at 3 am.

I am wondering what is going to happen after this.

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